Appearances
by MoondustWolf
Summary: Everyone can master a grief but he that has it. :William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing


**Appearances**

**Summary: **Appearances can be deceiving...short drabble-ish pieces from the POVs of each of the major characters on how nobody every really understands.

**Disclaimer: **Let's see looks at her possessions Nope, don't own House.

**A/N: **This was originally written for the wordsflyup Shakespearian quote challenge over at livejournal. It's going to be open for a while, so if you're interested, sign up! More people writing House fic would be lovely! Also, I'm sorry if the formatting on this is screwed up. I just can't seem to get this editing thing to work sigh And please review:)

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They keep telling Cuddy her job is easy.

House thinks she's only there to make his life miserable, his ducklings see her as "the man"- who gives orders and does nothing. Wilson doesn't care too much, but he's never stuck up for her.

None of them have her job, watching over everything. None of them are in charge of the aftermath of death- angry families suing and demanding answers, exposing her full-force to guilt and shattered lives.

She's never watched a man die. But she's watched the lives of his loved ones fall apart, and sometimes it's not that different

* * *

They keep telling Wilson he's a player of sorts, doesn't deserve his wife's love while he flirts with young nurses. 

House smirks, Cuddy rolls her eyes, Cameron would try to reprimand him were she brave enough, and Foreman and Chase shake their heads from afar.

Not that any of them have ever felt what he does- love that isn't love, really. Love that has lost its passion and devotion, that's left as a shell of 2 people who can't let go.

He does love Julie, with all his heart, just like he loved the last ex-wife and the one before that. He can't stand to hurt her, he does know what he is doing, and he does hate himself for it.

He thinks- knows in his heart- he'll never find true love. So he tries to fill that void with pieces that just aren't quite perfect, and hopes eventually he'll stop feeling so empty.

* * *

They keep telling Foreman he complains too much. 

Cameron rolls her eyes, Chase grumbles, House just laughs, and Cuddy and Wilson- well, they don't really know anything about the ducklings, but if they did, they'd say the same thing.

And, well, okay, maybe he hasn't lost a father or a husband, and maybe he doesn't have a bad relationship with his wife or constant pain in his leg. Maybe he isn't under constant scrutiny.

But that doesn't mean he has to be ignored.

That's why he wonders why he ever took this job. Not because it sucks- it does, but working in a hospital you can't expect too much- because he is going nowhere, because he feels trapped.

He is black, and even though that's usually beside the point, he feels he has something to prove. For his family, for his race, maybe even just for himself. But now he feels stuck here, and the frustration tastes like failure.

He wonders if he'll feel this pointless forever.

* * *

They keep telling Cameron not to care so much. 

Wilson and Cuddy peg her as unstable, House teases her, Chase groans at her, and Foreman tries to help sometimes only he doesn't really.

None of them get it- she's not weak, she's the strongest of any of them in some ways. Because when her life fell apart, when she lost the man she loved, she didn't lose the ability to care, she didn't automatically become detached from the world.

Instead, she was able to do what she knew her husband would want her too- keep being the woman he fell in love with, sensitivity and all.

Being involved can cause you to make a mistake, that's what all the "professional" doctors say. But they also say if you care too little, you don't deserve to try to help people.

She decides to go for the middle ground- care too much about patients she doesn't even know, and too little about herself.

* * *

They keep telling Chase he should be fired, that he betrayed House. 

Cameron can't look at him, Foreman can- he glares at him, Cuddy and Wilson keep giving him looks, and House punishes him by making his life a living Hell.

He doesn't know why he did it. He's really not a traitor by nature.

Now, his father is gone, and he can look back a little more clearly. Look at the man who, in a sense, did to him and his mother what he did to House. Chase's father abandoned his son, and left his wife to destroy herself.

He regrets ratting his boss out so much now because, with his dad dead, he can finally realize this is the best thing he's ever had in his life.

He realizes that this was the first time he's felt wanted at all, and muses that not knowing that sooner was what let him do what he did. When nobody cares for you, why should you worry about hurting anyone else?

* * *

They keep telling House he doesn't see how lucky he his 

They all- Cuddy, Wilson, Foreman, Cameron, and Chase- don't really understand, and they never will, as much as they all- especially Jimmy- may try to.

He'll forever be House the bastard, cold and snide and sometimes even cruel. People admire him, but few ever really like him, and he doesn't let it bother him too much.

He knows they whole world is naive, that none of them will ever have to walk in his shoes, hobbling on his cane, and stuffing pills down his own throat just to get through daily life.

He knows the pain is only in his leg, except for the small fact it's everywhere else, too. He knows and accepts that nobody else gets it.

He knows that the lot of them don't realize how good they have it.

_But then again, does anyone?_


End file.
